What to drink if you're not drinking

After a month of gaily swigging wine on a nightly basis on the grounds that there are no school nights right now, I’m getting the impression from friends that they’re beginning to rein back. Not only because it’s bit of a slippery slope – if one drink, then why not two? – but it’s not the best start to the following day. Not to mention an extra source of calories on top of all the cake and home-baked bread which we are now enjoying.

You could, of course, switch to lower-alcohol wines such as the charmingly elderflowery King Richard Dry White Wine 2018 (from George Hill of Loughborough) I tasted the other day, which is only 10.5%, though I suspect that possibly won’t affect your inclination to finish the bottle (in fact, it might even encourage you to do so). So, nights off are the safest option, but what to drink instead?

Since I last wrote about the subject in January, I’ve still not found an alcohol-free wine I like (the relatively decent Sangre de Toro range in Majestic – see panel below – comes closest to it), so it’s all about whatever cocktails you can concoct from what you’ve got available. The most obvious option being a G&T equivalent, assuming you can get the tonic. I tried to make my own from cinchona bark when I was researching my latest book, How to Drink without Drinking, but it was pretty disgusting and also now scarce since it was (questionably) touted as a cure for coronavirus) Where it was once mildly annoying that products such as Seedlip were much the same price as regular gin, it’s now a cause for quiet fury. It’s ironic, is it not, that alcohol-free spirits are so much dearer than wine? Anyway, Asda has the cheapest options at the moment.

As I write, fruit juices are still widely available, but I find them a bit viscous and syrupy to drink with food, and there’s only so much OJ you can put up with in self-isolation. The answer, I find, is to dilute it with water or, better still, water kefir (plus a few drops of orange flower water, if you have some). Or use juices to make cocktails such as a sea breeze (pink grapefruit juice, cranberry juice and lime) or the summery “croquet” I invented for the book: 50ml each of a light gin substitute such as Ceder’s (see panel below) and cloudy apple juice and 100ml cucumber tonic water. And lots of ice. Ice makes everything better.

Five drinks to help you survive booze-free nights

Sangre de Toro Rosé 0% £4.99 Majestic (orders are being taken and deliveries made through local stores). If you can enjoy the real thing on your drinking days, I’d skip this, but it’s not a bad substitute if you don’t drink at all. Serve well chilled.

Ceder’s Classic Non-Alcoholic Spirit £16 for 50cl (on offer) Asda, £20 Waitrose. A chance to buy one of the better gin substitutes on special offer. (Asda’s own-brand Extra-Special Non-Alcoholic Premium Botanical Drink at £16 is a good alternative when the Ceder returns to full price.)

Nonsuch Bittersweet Apple and Cardamom Shrub £16.95 (500ml) Master of Malt. My latest favourite – I adore cardamom – is this refreshing cider vinegar-based shrub that you dilute 4:1 with sparkling water. (Or add cardamom to a homemade apple shrub.)

Zero Five £1.40 a 330ml bottle or £16 for 12 Thornbridge Brewery, 0.5%. Previously known as Big Easy (there was a trademark issue), this is a properly satisfying, pale ale drinkalike.

Everleaf Non-Alcoholic Aperitif £18 Sainsbury’s. A refreshing, bittersweet, citrussy aperitif that the makers recommend diluting 3:1 with a light tonic, though I prefer it with a splash of soda water.

MW